Lights, Camera, Illness (Take #1)
Why solve problems when you can complain about them instead? Sometimes being delulu is the top-tier solulu. Right? Being a dance mom was hard, but being the mom of a sick child is even harder. How do I know?
Because you remind us... all. the. time. In person, on social media, via text, call, fundraisers — you name it. We get it, Carol. (You’re in full swing ~#SaintEra~ at this point, left to forage amongst us commoners.) *overly dramatic sigh*
The Diagnosis Diva
She’s mastered her manipulation skills to the point where they’re practically undetectable. By the time you walk out the door, sending love and good vibes, you’ve also baked a gluten-free cake, created a new GoFundMe campaign, and helped record the next vlog on her child’s latest (and greatest) diagnosis without even realizing it. From Carol’s perspective, medical conditions are like Pokémon. Why have just one? Gotta catch ’em all, baby!
Anytime someone hints at progress or alludes to improvement, she lets out a gasp large enough to suck up the remaining oxygen in the ozone layer and quickly pivots topics. It’s almost as if she got better; we’d have to talk about something else at book club… (Wait, does anyone actually remember what book were supposed to be reading???)
Sympathy Vampires
In all seriousness, no one would wish illness on a child. However, the whole “woe is me” act does get a little stale. When every outing turns into a performance, the activity ends up being a bit to post, and the conversation morphs into a full-blown pity party in 2.5 seconds flat—it may be time to seek help for yourself. (No? Just me?)
PSA: They do indeed offer therapy for parents and/or the designated support systems of children with chronic illnesses. (You don’t even need to have problems with guilt-tripping, gaslighting, or manipulation to attend! It’s typically FREE.99 via their hospital or insurance provider; just ask their physician.)
Emotional Support Humans
To all of the parents, loved ones, or friends who have become family that fight with your chronically ill children — with grace, resilience, and unwavering love in your hearts—it does not go unnoticed or unappreciated. Staying in the trenches when times get tough is just as tough for you. There is nothing wrong with seeking genuine emotional support from friends or via fundraising campaigns. By continuing to call “The Carols” out, hopefully, we can filter out disingenuous individuals from those who sincerely need support or feel uncomfortable asking for it.
You and your families are seen, heard, and loved. Keep fighting the good fight.
Gentle Reminder: Please keep in mind that not all illnesses are visible, but they can take just as much, if not more, of a toll on a person's life. Do not be “the guy” who approaches someone parked in a handicapped space in the mall parking lot, demanding a rationale. Just keep it moving. They do not owe you an explanation, nor is it your business.
“I didn’t ask to be strong. I wanted to be normal.” We’ve all seen it floating around the internet at some point or another. The power and beauty it yields are due to its ability to be left up to interpretation by the beholder. While physical strength typically jumps to mind first for many, perseverance against adversity, trials, and tribulations is what comes to mind for me. I’ve faced, battled, and worked to overcome various obstacles throughout my lifetime, including how to navigate being diagnosed with several chronic illnesses in adulthood.
It hasn’t been a cakewalk, but with the support of the most wonderful inner circle possible (Michy Ferris, Kara Woods, Kirsten Leili, Corie McCormick Myers, Faith Sobola, Larinna Chandler, and Peyton Ali Jarrell), a great therapist (it’s okay to blush, babes), and the unconditional love of the BEST husband a woman could ask for: James Todd Mashore.
Being strong isn’t so bad. *Angel Emoji*
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